So today I decided to lay down on the couch for my normal Sunday afternoon nap. Kayleigh was chatting on Facebook, while I decided to nap. It was going great until I had this dream… So here I am walking down this street, only there are no cars, just me a “friend” walking together that I have know idea who it was. Apparently we are walking to another friends house. We get there and it is a someone that I have never seen before, but in my dream was so close to me. He was small like a child though.
The my friend that we went to visit looks up at me and says, “Barry can you take me to Jesus?”, I feel that it is important to inform you that this friend of mine is paralyzed from the neck down. I’m not exactly sure why but he has no wheelchair, or anything. So I say to him of course I will take you to Jesus. I pick him up and hold him tightly close to my chest. He then looks at me and says “Thank You!” It is about this point that I fall to my knees, out of exhaustion, for some reason I cannot go on… I have this helpless child in my arms, who desperately wants to see Jesus, and I cannot do it. I start to apologize to him, and then begin to weep!
And at about that point, Kayleigh wakes me up, and tears are rolling down my face for real. She asked me what happened? and whats wrong? The only words I could get out, where I was not strong enough, all he wanted to do was see Jesus. After about 5 min of getting my composure back, I was then able to describe the dream to her more clearly. It was very eye opening, and for some reason while I was carrying him, I felt so selfish, and guilty, for being as blessed as I am.
I do not know what any of this means, but God defiantly used it to humble me a little bit today.
2 Comments
October 13, 2008 at 6:48 am
That was a crazy dream but definitely an eye opener!
I wish I could interpret it for you but I do know…you are incredibly strong and you have the biggest heart of anyone I have every met!
I love you with all my heart!
and BTW don’t ever wait that long to blog again
October 13, 2008 at 7:29 am
Barry,
Sometimes dreams are just dreams, sometimes they mean we ate something funny, and sometimes they are our subconscious working out an issue that we worry about or struggle with…
It sounds like you’re very aware of the magnitude of the desperation in the world around you, and want so badly to help…and – like all of us – worry that you aren’t strong enough to do it alone.
The good news is:
1). That you care and have a compassionate heart toward others – I’ve seen this myself and know it’s true!
2). You can’t do it all on your own…but, you don’t have to. God will stretch you through reaching out to others, but will always give you the strength to do what he asks.
3). We are in this together and – at least I can speak for Byron and myself – there are people around you that will help carry the burden when it gets too heavy.
Thanks for sharing and for encouraging all of us to look around and be compassionate. That’s what it’s all about!
Peace to you, Angie